Disclaimer : Blogspot is acting up and I can't get rid of the 5 different fonts going on here. Probably a good sign of how professional our predictions are.
Group A
Bert : France / Mexico. It would take a disaster of epic proportions, like handball karma, for France not to win this group. They have too much talent up front (Gignac, Gouvou, Henry), in the midfield (Ribery, Gourcouff, Diarra, Diaby, Malouda, I could keep going...) at the back (Gallas, Evra, Abidal), and in goal (Lloris) to not advance, and I wouldn't be shocked if they won all of their games handily. I am not convinced that South Africa is good enough to continue the host nation streak, and I think Mexico takes second. To make it worse South Africa plays France last, and unless they have clinched the group and lie down for the hosts I don't see France losing.
Andrew : Uruguay / France. There are other karmic forces at play here, like bad uniform karma invoked by France's bizarre Baby Björn jerseys. But aside from that, I can't disagree with Bert. This French team is stacked: Ribéry, Malouda, Anelka. How did this team almost not make it? Of course the answer to that is that they are poorly coached, and I'm using that term lightly. Logic dictates that against better talent than Ireland, they should falter, but logic also dictates that this team should thump everybody in their path until the knockout rounds. Can you tell I'm conflicted? When the draw was first published, I had Mexico and Uruguay advancing, and I still think the odds are pretty good that could happen. No, I'm not always this non-committal.
The French like clowns so much they made one their coach, I wonder how that will work out.Group B
Bert : Argentina / Greece. This group could be ugly, but I'd like to think even a coke snorting "suck it" shouting Maradona can't screw this one up... right? Argentina is loaded, and unless they sit Messi and play a 10-0-0 I can't imagine them doing any worse than 1-1-1 in this group. I might have some serious egg on my face though, but I'm willing to bet the Argentine players figure something out to counter the dreadful coaching of Maradona. I really want to pick Nigeria here, but Greece's suffocating defense should carry them past the first round. South Korea could also make me look stupid, but I'm predicting a group full of 1-1-1 teams that will bore fans half to death. I would really like to see Argentina eliminated, but God tends to ignore my prayers.
Andrew : Argetina / Greece. Nothing to add here, really. Maradona has absolutely no idea what he's doing, but I don't think it will matter in the group stages. Not in this group, anyway. Outside of Kyrgiakos, I couldn't name one player on Greece's team, but this pick is more about their manager, Otto Rehagel, than anything. Greece won the Euro 2004 under him, and that was not a fluke. He's one of the most successful German managers of all time, having led Werder to the title twice (during a 14-year stint), as well as leading 1.FC Kaiserslautern from the zweite Liga, to promotion, to the Meisterschaft, in two successive years, the only club in history to accomplish that quite incredible feat. Imagine Newcastle winning the Premiership next year, and you have an idea of what I'm talking about. Granted, Greece didn't do much at Euro 2008, but I can't bet against the Ottocrator.
This is the face of Argentina when we should be talking about Messi.Group C
Bert : England / United States. The easiest group to pick. I think England thumps better-than-we-think Algeria and Slovakia, and if Wayne Rooney continues his current form they may win all three games. I also think the US builds on its "success" in the Confederations Cup and takes down Algeria and Slovakia, but a draw against England is probably in the cards. The real prize here is winning the group, as the winner goes on to play the runner-up in Group D (very top heavy group) and the loser plays the winner (more on that next) which will not be easy.
Andrew : England / United States
Group D
Bert : Germany / Ghana. Much like France, I can't imagine Germany failing to win this group. It would take an epic failure on their end to be sent home here, and I can't imagine a scenario (that doesn't involve Jens Lehmann pissing behind the goal) where Germany doesn't win at least two of their games. At first I went with Australia for second, but EVERYONE is picking them to surprise, which inevitably means they won't surprise anyone. I think Ghana's recent success in the Africa Cup Of Nations will be enough to propel them, most likely needing two wins to escape this group. The schedule doesn't look good for them as they face Germany last, and Australia takes on Serbia to seal the group. If Ghana falters, look for the Socceroos (ugh, I can't believe I just typed that) to take advantage.
Andrew : Germany / Serbia. Germany is horrible, but they will still advance out of the group stage. After that, well, close your eyes. Serbia - I can't tell you why I just made this pick, but I did.
Group E
Bert : Netherlands / Cameroon. Another easy group to pick, but a fairly deep field. Holland should win at least two games here, and with Robin Van Persie back it should be three. The Dutch have a habit of looking great and stumbling to a disappointing finish, so another year of heartbreak is certainly a possibility. The big reward here is playing the second team in Group F, which could be a serious banker. Second in this group is tough, but I think Cameroon will ride semi-home field advantage to advance. Japan could be sneaky, and the Bendtner lead Danes could... oh wait, nevermind. I expect Cameroon to advance, but I wouldn't be shocked if Japan used its last game against Denmark (Cameroon closes out against the Netherlands) to advance.
Andrew : Netherlands / Cameroon.
Group F
Bert : Italy / Slovakia. The most top heavy group of the tournament, and easily taken by Italy. The Italians, as much as I don't like them, should completely destroy this group and look like convincing defending champions. Second place could literally be anyone, but I think Slovakia can do just enough to win. New Zealand qualified because they are in Oceania and have only once beaten a European or South American team (where is Slovakia and Paraguay?), and Paraguay haven't made it past the group stage in their last seven appearances. Sadly it could be decided by the Paraguay-New Zealand pillow fight that closes group play. Whoever limps out of this group at #2 is going to be fed to the lions and face the Group E winner (Holland) so, don't get too excited for them.
Andrew : Italy / Paraguay
Group G
Bert : Brazil / Ivory Coast. Ah, the group of death, but most importantly someone I hate/fear is going home. Brazil is loaded with uber talented players, and I foresee them taking at least two games from this group. It wouldn't shock me if they fell to second, but I think they are the most dependable team of the group. Who takes second is a tough call, and as much as I would like to see Didier Drogba watching the second round from the stands, I think the Ivory Coast advances. I have a feeling, if the last Euro taught me anything, Ronaldo will go into "Me First" mode here and weigh his team down by holding onto the ball too much and trying to take on the entire opposing team. I'm looking for the Ronaldo Face followed by the Ronaldo Crying Face and most likely a hissy fit after a transparent attempt to dive. Portugal is talented but he won't have the Galacticos to make him look good, and I think Ronaldo will be seen in the stands clutching his man purse. You are more likely to see an ad for his line of underwear than him actually playing during the second round. If all of that wasn't enough Portugal closes out the group against Brazil, and as tight as this group is I doubt either team will be taking it easy, especially with a banker against the runner-up in Group H as the prize for winning the group.
Andrew : Brazil / Portugal
Portugal fans should get used to this.Group H
Bert : Spain / Chile. Spain should have an easy time with Group F's twin. Spain has been riding high since the Euro, but I keep flip-flopping on their potential to win it all. Their starting roster is amazing, but we all know the Spanish have a penchant for choking, so I don't know if the Euro was a performance Heimlich for them or an aberration. Sadly their reward for torching this group will be a date with the runner-up from Group H (Ivory Coast), which won't be easy. As for second, I have to go with Chile only because they came in 2nd in South America and have a less putrid qualifying record than Honduras (5-1-4). I'm a bit wary as Honduras will finish against Switzerland, so if the Swiss completely fold a win for Honduras could ruin Chile's chances.
Andrew : Spain / Chile.
Round Of 16 (Match Number)
1A-2B (49)
Bert : France over Greece.
Andrew : France over Greece. I wrote Greece down first, just because I'm partial to Rehagel, but France is just too talented. Still, Greece over France would not surprise me.
1C-2D (50)
Bert : England over Ghana.
Andrew : England over Serbia. Barely, this team looks very vulnerable all of a sudden.
1D-2C (51)
Bert : Germany over United States. I'm willing to bet nobody will notice Ballack isn't playing at this point, unless you enjoy seeing him vanish for 90 minutes.
Andrew : Germany over United States. No question. OK, I know I said that Germany was bad, but not bad enough to lose to the Americans. God forbid.
1B-2A (52)
Bert : Argentina over Mexico.
Andrew : Argentina over Uruguay.
1E-2F (53)
Bert : Netherlands over Slovakia.
Andrew : Netherlands over Slovakia.
1G-2H (54)
Bert : Brazil over Chile.
Andrew : Brazil over Chile.
1H-2G (55)
Bert : Spain over Ivory Coast. I think Spain will get by, but just barely.
Andrew : Spain over Ivory Coast.
1F-2E (56)
Bert : Italy over Cameroon.
Andrew : Italy over Cameroon.
Quarter Finals (Match Number)
Winners Match 49 & 50 (57)
Bert : France over England. England has been a mess lately, so this isn't out of the question.
Andrew : England over France
Winners Match 51 & 52 (58)
Bert : Germany over Argentina. Well drilled vs. confused, I can't imagine how this one will end.
Andrew : Argentina over Germany. I will now cry in my beer.
Winners Match 53 & 54 (59)
Bert : Netherlands over Brazil. The Dutch exorcise demons still looming from '98, and this is not the Brazil we have come to expect.
Andrew : Netherlands over Brazil. Hey, why not?
Winners Match 55 & 56 (60)
Bert : Spain over Italy.
Andrew : Spain over Italy.
Semi Finals (Match Number)
Winners Match 57 & 58 (61)
Bert : Germany over France. The Germans are a terrible opponent for a poorly coached team, just ask Maradona.
Andrew : Argentina over England.
Winners Match 59 & 60 (62)
Bert : Spain over Netherlands. This could be a serious shoot out.
Andrew : Netherlands over Spain.
Final
Bert : Spain over Germany. Germany overachieve by drawing both coaches trying to run their teams into the ground, but in the end Spain guns them down. Klose/Podolski have been ghosts this year, so unless Schweinsteiger goes off on Spain I don't think Germany will have the firepower in this one.
Andrew : Netherlands over Argentina. These tournament picks have been brought to you by my dog. Well, they would've been if I had one. But there are just too many variables for me to nail down anything. Germany has a ton of injuries. Argentina has the most talent, but is coached by someone with the IQ of my imaginary dog. Spain is fantastic, but they just won the European Cup, and when has a team won the two tournaments in succession? No, really, I wanna know, but I don't feel like looking it up. So, maybe Robben stays hot and Sneijder gets hot, and Van der Sar comes out of retirement, and... this will never happen.
