Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Bundesliga : Stock Report, Week 6

Another late report, you can blame it on the apocalyptic state of the Bundesliga. If you aren't sitting down you probably should...ok... Bayern Munich is not top of the table. Something crazy is happening this season, and lowly Mainz is 6-0-0 and top of the world. I'm going to put it all on sample size, the season is still young and Mainz has been playing well beyond their means. If you watch them nothing jumps out at you, they are a very organized vanilla no-name team that has been playing well. I'll put my money on Dortmund to finish above Mainz, and I'll be shocked if they finish in a Champions League spot (Top 3).

Borussia Dortmund : UP.
Dortmund are on fire, winning 3-1 over St. Pauli and sitting #2 in the Bundesliga. Shinji Kagawa scores his fourth goal of the season, and they only have to play Bayern Munich next week.

Werder Bremen : NO CHANGE. Beat rival Hamburg 3-2, they had a 2-0 lead at the half and allowed two goals in 4' to start the second half. I finally got to see Marko Marin score, the guy reminds me of a not-as-funny Andrei Arshavin who actually looks his age. I'm so late on this report that Bremen have just finished their Champions League game against Inter, a bad 4-0 loss.

Side Note : Finally figured out what happened to Per Mertesacker, he took an elbow to an eye in an international friendly. Apparently it broke his eye socket and their were concerns of permanent damage to his vision, looks like he will be ok.

Bayer Leverkusen : NO CHANGE.

Kaisersluatern : NO CHANGE. Lose 0-1 to Hannover 96 in a dull game. Kaiserslautern had a few chances to score but let Hannover take this one. They are really falling down the table now and have probably settled into the bottom half for good.

VfL Wolfsburg : NO CHANGE. Didn't get to watch their 2-1 win over Freiburg. Grafite nets twice.

Eintracht Frankfurt : NO CHANGE. Win 2-0 over Nurnberg, vault out of the relegation zone... barely.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Fantasy Baseball, 150 Games Down

Well, this is it. Just about two weeks left in the season, so the misery will finally end for eight members of our league. Sadly, the misery will end, but some of it will carry over until next season. Maybe one day I will be cleansed with victory, but it isn't likely. Everyone but Andrew is in standings purgatory, as Drew is 7.5 points clear in first (70), with the second place team (62.5) 2.5 clear of me (60), and I'm 5.5 clear of fourth. I would need everyone on my team to pull a Tulo to jump into 2nd, and Andrew's team would have to invent negative HR's, K's, and RBI's to lose.

I'm basically the living dead right now. I can be extremely happy that my most expensive player, Tulo, is destroying the ball. Tulo missed a tad over an entire month and hit 12HR and 55RBI through August 31, then he ate some spinach and hit 14HR and 34RBI in the month of September. Just to clarify, September isn't over yet. Where was this 4 months ago Tulo?! I was drinking your bathwater all season, and you save this for the last month of the season?! Oh yeah, Zito broke his winless streak at 12 starts, thanks Barry.

Oh Tulo, you handsome, mercurial, injured, sandbagging devil.

Andrew's luck combined with a stellar pitching and the 7 Closers Strategy has helped him lock up the season. It also helps that the #2 team, which was in first for quite a while, basically burst into flames. He lost his best pitcher, letting Andrew in, and started streaming closers which made it even worse.

Current Status
Bert - Those rich fucks! This whole fucking thing... I did not watch my buddies die face down in the muck so that this fucking strumpet...
Andrew - Yeah well, I still jerk off manually.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Bundesliga : Stock Report, Week 5

Another short week, after watching Antonio Valencia break his leg mid-week I've been a little out of it. I only managed to catch two games this weekend (Werder Bremen-Mainz, and Schalke-Leverkusen), but the fixtures looked fairly vanilla (aside from the 7-0 ass kicking Borussia Monchengladbach took) so nobody moved around in the standings.

Borussia Dortmund : UP.
Shinji Kagawa! Dortmund beat rival Schalke 3-1, two of their goals coming from Japanese international Kagawa. Dortmund looked good, Schalke's recent form has been horrible, and they just couldn't catch a break today. This game could have been much worse for Schalke, I like what I saw from Dortmund today. This win puts them in 3rd, the season is young so that sounds more impressive than it should.

Werder Bremen : NO CHANGE. Lose 2-0 at Mainz in a very dull game. Neither side played all that well, but Bremen looked least interested in winning. I finally got to see Marko Marin play, and he didn't really do all that much aside from missing a few chances to put one on goal. They have been without Per Mertesacker, and I keep hearing alot of Champions League Fatigue excuses, its getting old. Mainz looked like they wanted this game, and took it, two preventable goals sent Bremen packing.

Side note : I learned that Bremen's rival/derby team is Hamburg SV, a team that could break into this list if I see good things from them.

Bayer Leverkusen : NO CHANGE. Draw 0-0 with Nurnberg, snooze. Despite having the ball 67% of the game, nothing much happened. It was even boring to read the game report, although Stephan Kiessling was injured.

Leverkusen may be lucky if this is as close as he gets to the field for the rest of the season.

Kaisersluatern : NO CHANGE. Draw 2-2 against TSG Hoffenheim, "plummet" out of the top after their win over Bayern. Their early form is slipping, but they aren't getting blown out of games.

Side note : Mainz is their rival/derby team, I may have said this last week.

VfL Wolfsburg : NO CHANGE. Win 2-0 over Hannover 96. Dzeko nets in this game, making it 4 goals in 4 games for him. This was a much needed win even though they are still in the relegation zone with a 1-0-3 record.

Eintracht Frankfurt : NO CHANGE. Lose 1-0 to FC Freiburg, still out of the relegation zone, but not by much.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Bundesliga : Stock Report, Week 3-4

Another short report. No games the previous week due to an International break, but plenty of fun this week. I was able to catch Werder Bremen and Kaiserslautern online.

Side note : I'm now very interested in true rivals. Whenever I've asked about rivals I get "Bayern Munich" as an answer. I can't believe the entire country is rivals with Bayern, so now I'm on a mission to figure out all of the rivalries.

Borussia Dortmund : NO CHANGE. Didn't get to watch them play, beat Wolfsburg 2-0. Their Japanese player scored one of the goals, I'm actually surprised there aren't more Japanese players in the Bundesliga.

Werder Bremen : NO CHANGE. Weird week for Werder, two draws; 0-0 with Bayern Munich in a so-so game and they come back from being down 2-0 to Tottenham in the Champions League, finish the game 2-2. Marko Marin nets in the CL game, this could have been bad for Werder. They have looked poor to start the season, but these games could signal a turnaround.

Bayer Leverkusen : UP. How can I root for a team with Ballack, easy, he was injured this week. Now he can stand on the sidelines and look very majestic, just like he did for Chelsea last year. Drew 2-2 with Hannover 96 this weekend.

Kaisersluatern : NO CHANGE. Lose on the road to Mainz 2-1 in a pillow fight of a game. The game was quite dull, but the goals were very good. Apparently this was a derby game, and the Mainz fans came with cardboard signs/models and made a giant Aztec complete with temple and still beating heart representing 1FCK. Why am I not shocked that Germans could organize such things, never seen this kind of thing before.

VfL Wolfsburg : DOWN. The fall continues, I know its early but they are melting down. Lose 2-0 to Dortmund, I think McClaren's head is going to explode. Apparently the Bundesliga is tougher than the Erdivisie.

Eintracht Frankfurt : UP. Stomp all over Borussia Monchengladbach on the road, walk away with a 4-0 win. I wish I could have seen this, quite a swing for Monchengladbach after scoring 6 last week.

Fantasy Baseball, 140 Games Down

The season is almost over, and part of me can't wait. I have a feeling Andrew has basically locked it up, for his second straight win, and if I'm lucky I could finish second. Andrew has been blessed by the Baseball Gods, who struck down the previous #1 team. Josh Johnson, one of his many great pitchers, is done for the season and opens up a number of categories for Andrew and I.

My team is basically in limbo. I'm 3 back of 2nd, and 7.5 back of first. My guys are just chugging along, this status update sums up my whole season, "Barry Zito excellent in seventh straight loss."

Oh, so I can expect three more?

Andrew's team can do no wrong at this point. I do find it funny that since he refused to trade Adam Wainwright to me the guy has been less than stellar. Since August 16th the guy is 1-5 and his ERA has "soared" from 2.06 to 2.50, guess I dodged a bullet there. I can't see Andrew losing this unless something horrible happens to his entire team, like if the NL just fell into the ocean.

Current Status

Bert - Johnson?
Andrew - If you will it, it is no dream.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Nike Drops A Deuce, Virginia Tech Ruins 2010-11

I think I threw up in my mouth a little last night, but not just because Virginia Tech failed to save college football (more on this later). Boise State and Virginia Tech trotted out wearing Nike's newest wave of Pro Combat uniforms, and they were worse than I could have imagined. The geniuses at Nike have ramped up their campaign to turn NCAA football uniforms into a very very unfunny joke.

I'm not going to go over the new wave of garbage, since I may end up grinding my teeth into dust. If you are interested in reviewing them one of my favorite blogs (Uni Watch, yes, I get it) did a good piece on them for ESPN. Read it here.

The Tron Pumpkins failed to beat the Clowns, sadly the joke is on us.

The uniforms from last night made me sick. Nike is using the tradition and interest in college football to spring a tasteless marketing campaign. Their justifications for the designs are a joke, I can't imagine many people are excited about their team looking like they were just in a coal mine (West Virginia) or part of the cast of Tron (Virginia Tech). I'm also not sure why Halloween is in this year, there are three teams (Miami, Virginia Tech, and Oregon State) that look like they should be trick-or-treating. I'm actually curious if the Great Pumpkin is going to run out with Miami this year.

Ok, enough of Nike. My hatred for their Pro Combat stuff is well documented and goes back to last year. I was upset last night, and even more so this morning, when Virginia Tech failed to restore some sanity to the world of college football. Just to be clear, I don't have anything against Boise State. They have a great coach and a very good QB, I'd trade Chris Peterson for Jeff Tedford and Kellen Moore for Kevin Riley any day. Actually, I'd trade a ham sandwich for Kevin Riley, but that's another story. My concern is that a very good team that plays in a garbage conference is now positioned to coast through the season and walk into the BCS title game.

I knew it would happen, but when I looked at the rankings this morning I was shocked to see that eight morons gave Boise State a #1 vote in the AP poll. Only four people voted Ohio State #1, luckily forty seven stuck to Alabama. My last hope is Oregon State, who travels to the blue turf, but after they choked against TCU (great game by the way) I doubt they will be able to pull it off. Boise State will face such juggernauts as Idaho, New Mexico State, Louisiana Tech, and San Jose State in conference play while Ohio State will have to play Miami, Wisconsin, Penn State, Iowa, and Michigan. I'm calling it right now, if Boise State plays in the title game 2010-11 will be a sham of a season. God forbid they win, if they do the entire BCS system will implode into an absolute mockery of reason.

If Oregon State loses everything will depend on the computer rankings. It was nice to see the coaches weren't drinking to blue Kool-Aid to start the season, but they voted Boise State up to #3 after last night. I pray the computers can take into account the pitiful conference and weak schedule when BCS Rankings time rolls around. I don't like the current BCS system, I think we need a +1 playoff, but letting in a team based on warm feelings and "fairness" is not the way to fix it.

Fantasy Baseball, Please End The Misery

My teeth hurt. I'm so over this season, its not funny anymore... lets get this over with.

My team, in conjunction with the Baseball Gods, is completely imploding. The Gods have struck me down without mercy, and thanks to my own stupidity its going to get worse. Jeremy Hellickson was promoted, went 3-0 with a 2.57ERA, and was promptly send down to the minors. Thanks alot Baseball Gods, at least you didn't help me win the Strasburg Lottery (TJ's and done for this and next season). It also turns out that taking a "Fuck This" managerial strategy isn't good, I missed the roster warning on my most unpalatable DL citizens (Rod Barajas and Jeff "I Shit The Bed" Niemann) and now that they are off the DL they are back on my roster. I'm going to jump out a window now.


Thanks for being awesome, now pack your bags.

Andrew continues to be the luckiest SOB on the planet. I knew Joey Votto would be good, I know he did as well, but nobody would have said that he would challenge Pujols for best overall. The two are duking it out for the Triple Crown, Votto is enjoying the offensive explosion in Cincy, and I wish I hadn't backed off him because he missed time for depression, or vertigo, or whatever crap I was hit with last year. Kelly Johnson continues to hammer the ball, defying all reason, so at this rate Andrew might crap a bar of gold

Current Status

Bert - Fuck the tournament.
Andrew - If you will it, it is no dream.